The 4 Fs by Angie Ledbetter

I see a recurring theme and common thread in many of my gratitude posts. Funny, these are the same things packed into my co-authored inspirational book too -- Family, Friends, Faith & Food -- and also the important things passed down through generations in my family.

Family: I wouldn't be who/where/what I am without them. My parents and grandparents, in particular, have molded me and given me the values I still hold dear. Thank you!

Friends: Some of my dearest friends I've had since kindergarten or my early days in Girl Scouts. They lift me up when I'm down and make me laugh often. Thanks to you, friend who lent my mom your "magic blue cape" for her journey through illness; thanks to all of you crazy writer women whose words inspire me daily; and thanks to all of you who've been there to share laughter, hugs and sadness. Oh, and I appreciate all you who've helped my kids through school, Scouts, sports, and other events when my husband has been unavailable because of work. All of you together have created a beautiful stream of companionship that continues to flow through my life.

Faith: I'm deeply grateful for my faith. It gets me through rough patches, gives me hope always and is a guiding principle I lean on often.

Food: Whether Cajun, Italian, country cookin', or some new concoction, I love my food. Preparing and eating good food gives me comfort and allows me to share the fruits of my labor with others. Food is the connecting element I find in many of my best memories and gatherings. I'm glad I can cook and thankful for the opportunities I have to commune with the important people in my life over a full table.

Journey by Angie Ledbetter

I've thought a lot about the end of our physical existence lately. Although it is agonizing to watch a dear loved one at the end of their time, even in the last days (or weeks or months) of decline, I find things to be thankful for.

There's nothing nice about brain cancer, or any terminal illness. There is, however, a beauty in the end days if we look closely enough for them.

Being a caregiver gives me a chance to return to my mother some of the same things she gave me in my earliest years: unconditional love, pampering, tender bodily care, hugs, favorite foods, and the comfort of being near.

I also realize the blessings of Mom's own personal battle with the deadly tumor -- she is not suffering physical pain, her long term memories and personality remain, she still has her joyous sense of humor and laughter, and her family and friends have gathered closely to be with her often. Those who love her have been able to spend precious time with her. I know of others who have not been so fortunate. A friend's brother who has this same glioblastoma tumor, located in a different lobe of the brain, are dealing with very negative personality changes. How hard that must be on his family. We all know nightmare stories of pain and suffering. Every day, I am grateful that this is not my mother's journey, and am reminded that in death, there is beauty; there are things in which to be thankful.

I thank all of you who are praying for Mother and for our family. It means a lot. It means the most. *smile*

My Drug Problem by Angie Ledbetter

Sadly, the title of this entry is familiar to many parents. I don't know anyone who hasn't been affected by drug or alcohol addiction; or has someone very close to them who has. This realization causes me worry for the future of our younger generations. Think about the people you know. Aren't many/most of them dealing with addiction issues?

The fact that I am not, and neither are my children (please, God, and knock wood), is attributable to the values and ethics instilled by my parents long ago. But many parents warn their kids about drugs. What makes the difference in those who fall prey and those who escape the devastating web of these substances? I believe it has to do primarily with graduating from the School of Drugs. I've read similar "research" from others, and the easiest way to explain this teaching is to give examples from my own childhood "drug problem."

I was drug to church every single solitary Sunday of the world, no matter if we were out of town or I didn't feel good. I was constantly being drug to family functions, parties and reunions; all of which I hated. Likewise funerals, weddings and meals. My ears are probably larger than they should be from all the times I was drug to my room and punished for being sassy, disrespectful, or for failing to make good grades at school. Several times I was drug to the sink and my mouth washed out for spouting an unacceptable word. More times than I'd like to remember, I was drug from my warm bed to do Saturday Morning House Cleaning. My parents drug me on weekends and school vacations to plant sweet potatoes, work car washes or bake sales to earn money for Girl Scout trips. I was drug frequently against my will to help others who had no one else at home to do chores.

Those drugs (and many others) forced upon me by my parents still run through my veins today and affect how I act and make choices. The residual effect is stronger than that left by all combined popular "recreational" drugs available today. And now, my poor children, hopefully, are suffering from the same generational genetically encoded behavior pattern. BIG words of gratitude to parents who are drugging their offspring today.

Family Matters by Angie Ledbetter

Just returning from a 3-day trip to attend a nephew's wedding, I feel like I could sleep for a week. But the drive and missed time in my own bed were well worth being in attendance at a large family celebration.

Since I spent a lot of time looking through my camera's viewfinder, I had fun seeing things both close up on small details, and as a participant. Billed as the "Cajican" wedding (Cajun groom from Louisiana + Mexican bride from Texas), the event was a smooth melding of cultures, old friends and new, all in a beautiful and rustic resort setting -- Hideout on the Horseshoe outside of Austin: http://www.stayandfloat.com/

I'm thankful things went so smoothly. The vows were exchanged outside on a natural rock platform overlooking the river. As the bridal party was walking back up the stone steps to the reception pavilion, a light shower "blessed" us all, then disappeared. The food, live band's eclectic mix of music from several eras and genres, and camaraderie went into the wee hours of Sunday morning without any problems. It was a wedding no one will forget.

Several things made me realize how grateful I am to have had such a weekend: younger relatives helping older ones across rocky paths unasked and playing with young kids to keep them from becoming bored; the visiting between cabins of relatives, friends, and strangers; the spirit of cooperation toward one goal; kind and helpful attitudes; delicious shared food; the awesome beauty of nature surrounding the whole event; and another chance for my own family members to bond. There wasn't a single fight between the three kids jammed in the backseat of the vehicle for the long drive there and back, which is a minor miracle in itself.

It was a weekend away from our routine paths, and one which we all enjoyed to the fullest. It reconfirmed all the important things in life -- family, celebrating life and taking time to really be with one another instead of chasing individual pursuits.

What They Gave Me by Nannette Croce

Like so many I am all too ready to blame my parents for what I did or didn’t do in life. Growing up with an extended Italian family I can spread the blame around to aunts and uncles as well. But in recent years, as most of them have passed away or aged, I’m softening my view and seeing what I gained from each of those people who played such major role in my formative years.

My Mom gave me my quick wit, heightened sense of justice, and fashion sense.

My Dad, the Engineer, gave me my organizational skills, my logical approach to problem solving, and my slightly more tempered ambition.

My Aunt Jeannette, the intellectual of the family, gave me a love of history and also entrusted to me all the important family papers and journals, even though I was not the oldest, but knowing I would most appreciate them. Uncle Fred, the only non-Italian, taught me how the rest of the world lives and that with an open mind and a big heart, you will never be an outsider.

Aunt Thelma, with no children of her own, told wonderful stories and taught me not to forget my inner child, even when I had one of my own. While her artistic ability skipped my generation, she passed it to two grandnieces. Uncle Bill, the “gregarious one” taught me how to enjoy good wine and the society of friends and family, and, eventually, how to accept death with grace and dignity.

Yes, there were drawbacks growing up with so many people poking noses into my business, but as the years pass on, I realize it’s the benefits that maintained the strongest hold.

I'm Thankful by Jenny Gardiner

I loved that Barbara decided to launch this blog with a theme devoted to thankfulness. There is so very much for which to be grateful in life, and sometimes we get so wrapped up in the mundane complaints, we lose sight of the bigger picture.

So for starters, the many things for which I am thankful. My wonderful family. My kids who despite being teens are great fun to spend time with. My many pets, as long as they aren’t barking too much, or snapping my digits off with a powerful beak. My home, which, although it is in permanent need of all sorts of repairs and a good overall scrubbing and organizing, is home. Delightful, cozy, a place I always look forward to returning to (and hoping it’s not gotten too out of control messy while I was gone).

My career. While so far, writing hasn’t proven itself to be particularly remunerative, I hope that in time this will follow. In the meantime, what a treat to be able to write for a living (and how lucky I am that my husband can earn enough to allow me the time to try to actually earn a living as a writer). It sure beats a lot of other low-paying jobs out there. And provides a great outlet for creativity and a chance to work in sweats.

For good friends, who make the fun times even better and who are there to soften the blow during trying times.

For good health, which we always forget to appreciate when we have it, but which I am often acutely aware of being grateful for, having had bouts of medical issues with my family that caused great angst and distress.

For a glorious blue sky and the hint of spring in the air on a January day. For people who are willing to do the really hard jobs in the world, so that we don’t have to. For the ability to have at our fingertips whatever food, whatever drink, and pretty much anything we want. So many people in the world go without as a matter of course. Certainly in our country we are indulged with privilege to a far greater degree.

I’m grateful that cigarettes can’t be smoked in most public buildings. I’m thankful that we no longer live in a city with burdensome traffic that creates added stress in life. I’m grateful that even though my dishes are pretty dirty, piled up as they are on my kitchen counter, well, hey, we have dishes. That’s a good thing! I’m thankful that my city is rich with generous people who contribute not just their money but their time to help others less well-off.

I’m thankful for soldiers who selflessly give of themselves in defense of the rest of us. I’m thankful for the many people who devote their lives to improving the health and welfare of the world.

And even though I get frustrated that I can’t get rid of that extra weight, believe it or not, I’m grateful I’ve been lucky enough to have the opportunity to have gained it, rather than wondering from where my next meal might come.

Life is good. Life isn’t perfect, but then again, it never will be. But life is, to a certain extent, what you make of it and how you look at it. And I try to see it at its best.

Thanks for having me, Barb!


Jenny Gardiner’s work has been found in Ladies Home Journal, the Washington Post and on NPR’s Day to Day. She likes to say she honed her fiction writing skills while working as a publicist for a US Senator. Other jobs have included: an orthodontic assistant (learning quite readily that she was not cut out for a career in polyester), a waitress (probably her highest-paying job), a TV reporter, a pre-obituary writer, and a photographer (claim to fame: being hired to shoot Prince Charles–with a camera, silly!). She lives in Virginia with her husband, three kids, two dogs, one cat and a gregarious parrot. In her free time she studies Italian, dreams of traveling to exotic locales, and feels very guilty for rarely attempting to clean the house. Her novel, Sleeping with Ward Cleaver, was the winner of Dorchester Publishing/RT's American Title III contest.